"It's easy, son. Policeman: How could you kill 49 people? A grasshopper walks into a bar and tells the bartender this is his first time at a bar and asks for a beer. "Welcome back everyone!" Johnny says, "None." When she gets to the bathroom, her husband asks, "Who was that?" ', My girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year, A DEA officer stopped at our farm yesterday; he said I need to inspect your farm for illegal growing drugs., A man wakes up in a hospital, bandaged from head to foot. Curious, the tattoo artist asks him why he would possibly want that. ". They rent the same hotel room they spent their honeymoon in. When he reached the hotel, he found two doors written on them: He looks around the main area for an open bar or something similar, yet he cant find anything. You order what you want, and when you see what the other fellow has, you wish you had ordered that. A man had a bad case of stuttering. After a long engagement, nPeter and his wife, Mary had taken the step of matrimony. What do you mean? asked the mother, perplexed. was not a good opening to the speech I guess. A teacher is teaching a class and she sees that Johnny isn't paying attention, so she asks him, "If there are three ducks sitting on a fence, and you shoot one, how many are left?" One day, Peter and Mary sat down to discuss what traits they wanted their baby to have. So yeah, I might not be the best wedding planner. "Yep," the wife replied, "in-laws.". A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her shower, when the doorbell rings. "Great," the husband says, "did he say anything about the $800 he owes me?" For the wedding, my whole family and friends flew over to her home town of Moscow. On the night of their golden wedding anniversary, the wife decided it was time she found out what was, "if there are 9 birds on a fence and the farmer shoots 1, how many birds are left? His wife rolls over and says, 'What in the world was that?' "It was Bob the next door neighbor," she replies. The bartender hands him a bottle and says Hey, did you know we have a drink named after you? The grasshopper shakes his head in amazement and says What?!? The lady replied, "I need it to poison my husband." Giuseppe replied to the assembled husbands, "Wella, I'va tried to treat her nicea, spenda da money on her, but besta of all is, I tooka her to Italy for the 25th anniversary!" When Paul and Linda announced their engagement, I regret to say that a number of people expressed their concern as to whether they were doing the right thing. They celebrate it in the same hotel as where they spent their honeymoon 50 years ago. At the session last week, the priest asked Giuseppe, who said he was approaching his 50th wedding anniversary, to take a few minutes and share some insight into how he had managed to stay married to the same woman all these years. 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